


The Fossett Doge Club

by Small_Hobbit



Series: The Ocelot Collection [20]
Category: Sherlock Holmes - Arthur Conan Doyle
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-21
Updated: 2017-03-21
Packaged: 2018-10-09 00:59:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10400190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Small_Hobbit/pseuds/Small_Hobbit
Summary: Holmes is called in to investigate a case at a select gentlemen's club.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Written for LJ's Froday Flash Fiction Challenge: #17.06 Wierd and Wonderful: Book Titles

Holmes read through the letter twice before saying to me, “Have you heard of the Fossett Doge Club?”  
  
“No,” I replied.  
  
“That is perhaps not surprising.  They are an exclusive gentleman’s club, catering for gentlemen of certain persuasions.”  
  
I wasn’t sure how to react to this, and Holmes must have seen it in my face, for he said, “Oh, nothing which involves unwilling participants.  Its activities might not be to everyone’s taste, but those who take part do so by their own choice.”  
  
I was relieved.  It would not be the first time Holmes’ help had been requested from an organisation whose purposes, whilst not necessary injurious to others, were at least dubious.  
  
“Nevertheless,” Holmes continued, “the activities are such they must be kept from the public eye.”  
  
Here I was not concerned.  What the public didn’t see wouldn’t hurt them.  There was plenty they did see, but did nothing about, although that is another matter.  
  
“Which is why they consulted you,” I said.  “What are the details?”  
  
“In a nutshell,” Holmes waved several sheets of paper - the writer was clearly long winded. “I have been asked by the club’s secretary to investigate the theft of various members’ property.”  
  
“Because they are unable to go to the police.”  
  
“Precisely.  I shall call on them this evening, as a gentleman looking to see what they have to offer.”  
  
“Would you like me to come with you?” I asked.  
  
“Not on this occasion.  I shall be going in disguise.”  
  
“Is it wise for you to go alone?”  
  
“I was thinking of asking the Ocelot to accompany me.”  
  
“How will you explain his presence?”  
  
“A whim, dear boy, a whim.”  Holmes’ voice was perfect for one of the aesthetes we occasionally saw at the opera or the music hall.  
  
“I shall look forward to hearing how you get on,” I said.  
  
***  
  
Holmes and the Ocelot returned late that evening.  Holmes looked very satisfied as he sat down in his armchair and took out his pipe.  
  
“It went well?” I asked.  
  
“Very well,” he replied.  “It soon became clear who the culprit was.  However, merely identifying him will not be enough, we have shall have to expose him.”  
  
“We?” I enquired.  
  
“If you are game.”  
  
“Most certainly.”  
  
“Excellent.  Let me explain my plan.”  
  
***  
  
Holmes was keen to make progress, but knew he would need to wait a few days before making a second visit to the club to avoid causing suspicion.  It did, however, allow us time to perfect the plan.   
  
Some of the activities required the members to change into athletic garments, leaving their usual clothing neatly at one end of the room.  It would be impossible to move along the row of clothing without being noticed, but if one were to partake of the activity and leave one’s own clothing next to those of the person one wished to steal from, this would be perfectly possible.  
  
In addition, were the whole room distracted, one could then avail oneself of the opportunity to steal from the garments of other members too.  It was this possibility Holmes intended to exploit.  Once a week, a group of gentlemen congregated for the purpose of body building.  This of itself would not attract the attention of anyone, but these particular gentlemen chose to do their body building wearing tutus.  One can imagine the consternation which would be caused if any of the participants were publicly identified.  
  
Holmes planned to attend the class, as a visitor, with his physician.  Holmes had explained on his first visit he had been recommended to take exercise, but to avoid overtly straining himself.  I would therefore be there to observe the class and see whether it fell into the type of exercise I would approve.  Holmes cheerfully assured me I could remain in the shadows so I would be unlikely to be recognised, especially as the members would have other more attractive sights to view.  
  
I was not sure I was entirely happy with the idea of people not wishing to look at me.  I am not a vain man, but one does not like to think they are completely invisible.  However, since the planned object of their interest was to be the Ocelot, I was not going to complain.  
  
The Ocelot would be wearing a new tutu.  The pink one he regularly wore was showing signs of usage, and there were a few small mends in it.  Therefore Holmes had purchased a length of pale blue gauze, which Mouselet expertly fashioned into a new outfit.  I had to admit, when he tried it on, he looked most impressive and we were confident all eyes would be on him.  
  
Accordingly, late that evening the three of us made our way to the Fossett Doge Club.  Holmes was welcomed into the bodybuilders’ group and the Ocelot sprang into place.  They had been practising for about fifteen minutes when, at a nod from Holmes, the Ocelot started to perform a routine.  As predicted, everyone was entranced.  
  
Holmes waited until his suspect was beginning to rifle through the garments at the far end of the row from where he had left his own.  He then raised his voice and said clearly, “Colonel Merryweather, whatever are you doing?”  
  
Merryweather turned, two watches and a wallet in his hand.  The group also turned to look at him and as one began to advance on him.  The gentlemen may have been wearing tutus, but all of them were regular bodybuilders.  Merryweather suddenly looked afraid.  
  
The gentlemen did not touch him, but the senior member of the group (whose august standing in society I will not reveal) held out his hand and Merryweather deposited his ill-gotten gains into it.  
  
“You will also make good the other losses which have been sustained,” the eminent personage ordered.  “Get dressed and depart.  And leave your tutu; you will not be needing it any longer.”  
  
As this was being said, Holmes and I strategically withdrew.  Once we were sure all was well, Holmes whistled and the Ocelot joined us, having received the thanks of the members present.  
  
“An excellent evening’s work,” Holmes said.  “However, I am quite glad it is over.  Unlike our present companion, I did not fancy exercising in a tutu.”

**Author's Note:**

> The book title in question is "Body Builders in Tutus"


End file.
